The birth of a child is a great joy for the whole family. However, children growing up in the family accept the new member with fear, hurt, or even anger. In this article, you can find tips on how to properly prepare your kid for a sibling.
Show your child pictures of how the baby grows and changes in the belly. Think aloud what the baby is doing in the belly, how it feels, maybe kicking or turning. Use a pregnancy tracker to understand better what is going on with the baby in the belly and explain it to your older child.
Say something your child already understands. You can compare the situation with his or her friends’ family. If his or her friends are younger, it will be like having a friend who is born into your family to be a brother or sister.
Encourage the child to communicate with the baby in the belly, explain that the baby can hear him and will recognize his voice after birth.
Involve the child in preparing for the birth of the baby: buying things, clothes, choosing a name, etc. Let them even help set up the baby’s room. This can make them feel included and excited about their upcoming arrival.
Go through his first photos with the older child, show what he or she was like when he or she was a baby, what he or she learned, and how he or she behaved – this way it will be easier for the child to understand what his or her brother or sister will be like born. Talk to the older child about how lucky he or she is to have a little brother or sister. They will have much fun playing together when the baby grows up.
All changes should be implemented at least a few months before the baby’s birth. If you plan to start sending the older one to kindergarten, get him used to sleeping in his bed. Before the baby is born, these changes will be in the older’s routine, and it will not cause additional stress, anxiety, and fear for the older child.
There will be a time when the new baby will need mom for most of the day. It can be a difficult challenge for every member of the family. Even if the child has communicated a lot and closely with the father, less time and attention from the mom can cause the child to resist and even reject the father. The father should strengthen the bond with the older child, play, and spend more time with the older child.
Encourage your child to ask questions. They might be curious about what babies do, how they grow, and what life will be like with a younger sibling. Answer their questions honestly and in terms they can understand.
If your child bursts out, just be with your child and let him vent his emotions. Your goal is to create a calm and supportive environment for your child. If a child can express his emotions to a safe, attentive, accepting adult, it helps him work through these feelings and learn to calm down on his own. Over time, he will learn and be able to regulate his emotions.
Your actions must be consistent. That’s why it’s so important to stick to a routine. Set a schedule for the day that includes meals, naps, playtime, and even housekeeping. Be sure to monitor whether the schedule is properly followed every day, warning the little one about upcoming changes.
At home, turn off the phone, the computer, and tell your child: What are we going to do? Let him lead. Playing releases fears and anxieties, so play together with your older child, laugh, and be carefree. Have a huddle. Let your child tell you what’s important to him.
Try to avoid negatives as much as possible. If you say a lot of things to your child, which will only have a negative effect, your child can feel anxiety and fear due to coming arrival. Of course, it is not easy to speak always in a positive manner, but the result is worth the effort.
Remember, each child is different, so prepare for the conversation according to their age, maturity level, and personality. The key is to make it a positive and exciting experience for them, answer any questions, and help them cope with any concerns they might have.